luci: GIDLEY I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD talmage: PUT THE FUCKING KNIFE AWAY [ashley]: he's awake! Continue reading "does it have pockets"
interrogation
rocco: *yelling* RAJA!! raja: *SQUAWK SQUAWK* talmage: SHHHHH bishop: oh my GOD we're trying to be QUIET
sunset prison break
talmage paints rocks, luci does yoga, bishop rescues a friend (?)
talmage: i think if you learned more about these things that you can do, you would be able to process that stress a lot better rocco: you know who's really good at magic, luci? talmage: (shouting) i LITERALLY can't cast most of the magic i used to be able to! rocco: ... i meant radious talmage: oh radious: *laughs* he thought you were talking about him
family matters
a cat explodes, talmage breaks & enters, luci’s intelligence is questioned
radious: is he an idiot? everyone: mmmmmmmmm ... radious: is he enough of an idiot to follow the cat here? everyone: hmmmmmmmm ...
infinite mayonnaise
raja dreams, rocco prays, bishop fucks up
[dee]: i mean thus far we have a 20% chance of poison and a 10% chance of mayonnaise [emily]: mayonnaise is a form of poison [ashley]: IT IS
there are two dragons. you are gay
raja goes for a swim, rocco chokes on pickles, luci says goodbye
talmage: i'm just saying it's like, it's gold ... it's gold, right? bishop: do you want me to just carry it out in my hands? rocco: i have a jar of pickles if somebody wants to eat 'em really fast! talmage: do you??? rocco: do you want some pickles? talmage: to replace that jar with liquid gold? yes, i will eat a thousand pickles. bishop: we don't have to eat the pickles, we can dump the pickles out
one in a million
rocco goes super saiyan, bishop remembers a friend, talmage receives an order
luci: i have a question first. luci: am i a sphinx? bishop: no, you're twinky luci: i think it's a valid ques-- whAT luci: WHAT DID YOU CALL ME
the blood of 14 beetles
luci is bored and therefore a public menace, bishop makes friends, talmage practices normal magic in a normal way
rocco: are you sure you're not like, part cat? bishop: no. rocco: are you a cat god? bishop: i am not a cat, and i am not a god. cat: *PURRING LOUDLY* bishop: this cat is very loud in my ear.
glorified babysitter
talmage finds an old friend, rocco has an assassin babysitter, luci gets knifed
rocco: i named him sparkles because his eyes reflect the moonlight :) graves: would you like to see. *pulls out his wallet* graves: this one ... is sparkles.
charmed the pants off him
mr. graves gets a letter, bishop steals pants, talmage lights up
luci: is he like your ... babysitter? luci: he sounds like ... a nanny? is he your nanny? rocco: that's not-- luci: butler? but like, in charge of you rocco: he's like a nanny, but he's really good at, like, kung-fu fighting and stuff luci: ... a ninja nanny talmage: ... a bodyguard? rocco: he's a bodyguard! he's my bodyguard. rocco: ... that makes me sound like a little bit of a baby and a loser